Humorous Christmas Quotes

People do not really love the mess created
In their homes day a night
But one mess they just love to create
And that is when one decorates the
Christmas tree in the night
A time with so much radiance
A time that is so much fun
Merry Christmas!

"Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year."
- By Victor Borge

"There is a remarkable breakdown of taste and intelligence at Christmastime. Mature, responsible grown men wear neck ties made of holly leaves and drink alcoholic beverages with raw egg yolks and cottage cheese in them."
- P.J. O'Rourke

"Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas."
- Johnny Carson

"The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other."
- Johnny Carson

People get really get worried
That they have gained weight between
Christmas and the new year
Actually they should worry about the
Period till the new year
When they actually have lots of stuff
Merry Christmas to you!

"Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven."
- W. C. Fields

Christmas is just like doing
Work in your office, think about it
You are doing all the work
Day in and day out
And credit is taken by some fat guy around
As Santa takes the credit of Christmas fun
Haha..Wish you a Merry Christmas!

Santa I am taking up your role
Because I like that sledge on the snow
I will give all the gifts as you
I will spread the happiness along
You have grown so old now
And I know I am much strong
Wishing a Merry Christmas to you!

"Who's the bane of Santa's life? The elf and safety officer."
- By Catherine Tate

"Christmas is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your feet."
- Author Unknown

"Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time."
- Doug Coupland

I think I will be the Santa this year
Every year I ask for many things
And end up getting nothing in my list
So I will sneak out of my room
And make my Christmas memorable
Enough for me too
It's the Christmas fun so lovely too
Merry Christmas to you!

Once again we will get excited
With season's choicest delights
And more excited about the Christmas lights
With shopping at heavy discounts
Finding the right price
Once again we will celebrate the
Christmas night,
Merry Christmas!

All the party people
All the fun in your heart
Christmas is about to come
So let us make a welcome start
With all the list prepared
With all the tasks up there
Wishing you a Merry Christmas!

"The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live."
- George Carlin

I do not actually ask things from Santa
Just the random things he may give
But this year I am asking for a slimmer me
And a bank account to compliment me
Last year it happened just the opposite
And there was nothing I could do about
Merry Christmas to you!

"Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money."
- Author Unknown